Lamer Legion

---HAN---

 Han, our Austrian off-meta specialist, is a wildcard in every game. His performances swing between complete disasters and masterpieces, leaving little room for mediocrity. Resistant to coaching, Han marches to the beat of his own drum. Now equipped with a new mic, his teammates can finally understand his in-game strategies. Fun fact: Han also plays baseball, which perfectly sums up his quirky and unpredictable nature. His connection is trash

Enr1co 

Enr1co is the youngest and highest-rated player in Lamer Legion, brimming with potential and confidence. He often believes he's on the cusp of going pro, but his penchant for arena games reveals his true love. Enr1co's play style is characterized by explosive starts, but he tends to falter in longer matches—much like his sex life. Despite this, his raw talent and enthusiasm make him a valuable asset to the team. He might yell a lot at ---HAN--- in TGs.

SC-Quartoze 

 SC-Quartoze is the "schwitzer" of our group. His play style revolves around safety and solid defenses: walls, walls, walls, and a booming economy. You'll often find him deploying his beloved ponies, knights, and paladins to dominate the battlefield. Known as the self-proclaimed Nomad god (thanks to a single ladder win in 2006), SC-Quartoze is a reliable and decent team player who always has his team's back. He also coaches a soccer team - poor team.

Gummibaer

Gummibaer, affectionately known as "der Papa," is our seasoned veteran. A washed-up former Command and Conquer 3 pro player, he barely maintains 40 effective APMs. His town center is often more idle than your mother's bedroom, but he compensates with exceptional raiding skills. While multitasking might not be his forte, Gummibaer is the organizer of Lamer Legion, keeping our team together and on track. He might flamme you ingame. Go figure! 

Oerni

Oerni is the freshest recruit of Lamer Legion, and boy, does he have a lot to prove. Joining as a prospect, he’s currently trying to crawl back into the Age of Empires scene with all the finesse of a villager stuck on a tree. While his eagerness is commendable, his low performance often leaves us questioning whether he’s playing Age of Empires or trying to reenact a medieval disaster movie.

A retired soccer player (thanks to his glass bones and paper skin), Oerni couldn’t keep up with the physical demands of the sport. His infamous inability to adjust his pace—dubbed "1-tempo guy"—makes you wonder if he’s secretly auditioning for a tortoise race. Fragile as he is, we’re just glad he doesn’t have to worry about injuries while laming a boar.

Despite all this, Oerni’s dedication and humor bring a lot to the team. Whether he's stumbling his way through a fast castle or forgetting to queue villagers, he reminds us all why gaming is about the journey, not the APM. Keep running, Oerni—at that one glorious tempo of yours.